I always thought of myself as a patient person, in fact it's a point of pride. Lately though my patience are wearing thin. There are a number if pots on my burners and nothing seems to be cooking.
When do I give up? When do I realize, this is it? This is what I've got and nothing more is coming. But I don't want to give up, I want what I want and I want it NOW! Said with a foot stomp! Problem is, no one is listening to my temper tantrum and time passes ever so slowly frustrating the hell out of me.
My whole body aches from the fight to move forward. I feel like I'm pushing a bus full of elephants up a hill in San Francisco! I hear they have a few impressive hills. With every inch forward I slide a foot back. Hoping beyond hope the bus doesn't just flatten me altogether. Am I done? Should I give up?
Not in my nature, but as time wears on it's feeling more and more like I need to make it a natural response. I'm stubborn, maybe too used to getting what I want. I've never been denied before and what's looming on the horizon is denial. Should I pack it in? Drop the gloves? Give up? Walk away?
Patience is a virtue, so they say. But patience is a frustrating bitch too! She doesn't play fair and likes to throw you a curve ball or two or three. Everyday patience and I battle and every day she wins. Is this a good thing? No, I'm tired of waiting. I've put my demands on the table and I want them met! I'm not willing to compromise on them and letting them go really isn't an option. I might not have a choice in the matter but that's not going to be my choice.
That's, how I see it,
Tammy.
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